He insists on dying, madly, firmly, persistingly. It's as if there's no hope of being more glorious other than holding on to it, so the final breath of his would carress his face and say goodbye in whisper, which deaf him of all others' crying, begging him to stay for just one more second.
It's not like he's going to committ suecide, no, not like that. He just take it serously that he himeslf wouldn't hope of begging for any more second when the last is approaching. So in a twisted way, he could be sure that in all time he could call himself brave, not a coward. Thus is certified, his dignity.
